Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Safety never takes a vacation

As a mall security guard, Paul Blart (Kevin James) is devoted to keeping crime and mischief out of the New Jersey shopping center where he works, even if he isn't allowed to wear a gun. But Santa's helpers decide to be naughty, taking Paul's loved ones hostage, so he has to use all his training to save them.

Paul Blart: Mall Cop answers the pressing question - Can a chubby guy be a superhero too - in the resounding affirmative. TV's King of Queens lovable working stiff Kevin James relocates to suburban Jersey in an even larger than life silly but good natured laughathon on the big screen as the crimefighter mall cop in question, who's more than a little obsessive about cornering anyone shopping around for trouble. Paul Blart: Mall Cop stars James as the hapless 21st century Jackie Gleason, scorned and ridiculed both on and off the job, but not hearing any of it. Between nurturing elaborate fantasies of supersized superheroics, Blart spends a typical day running over a neighborhood dog tailgating his scooter on the way to work, directing civilians to exactly which stores the heated toilet seats are located in, and being subjected to a Victoria's Secret beatdown by an irate shopper dissing the slutty underwear. Paul Blart has always wanted to become a law enforcement officer, but sadly has not been able to make that wish a reality due to his hypoglycemia. Instead he has had to settle for a job as a security guard. Blart is also a single dad duped into a green card marriage by an even more rotund illegal alien femme fatale, who left him to raise preteen daughter Maya (Raini Rodriguez) alone. But he's showered with plenty of maternal doting, emotional support and platefuls of food at home by both Mom (Shirley Knight) and surrogate parentally inclined Maya. And though the family is eager to match him up with a mate online, Blart wears his heart conspicuously on his sleeve at work, nursing a crush on perky wig saleslady Amy (Jayma Mays). But running interference on his courtship moves, is a gang of cutthroat shoplifters who show up one day, intent on conspiring a hostile takeover of the premises on skateboards, and committing assorted acts of mall malice. Not to worry, Blart singlehandedly sets his sights on finally getting a chance to seriously show his stuff chasing down these athletic accomplices. Which includes making the most of his mountainous assets like gargantuan sliding and slithering around the mall, and flattening the felons with the advantage of his ample torso, when not beating up a perp with a handy tanning machine. He also gets a little help from a jar of some sort of wickedly spicy condiment called The Devil's Crotch, enough said.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is an affectionate if often sitcomish ode to creative copping and mindless mall madness. In any case, James sweats it out lifting the material above the mundane and derivative, and nicely proves that in an emergency, size matters and extra large superheroes can rule. James rules in this comedy about a mall cop destined to do great things. A definite 4 on my "Go See" scale.


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